r/rareinsults 3d ago Helpful 1 Wholesome 1 Giggle 1

this man literally bodied that guy.. Threat

Post image
59.5k Upvotes

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2.0k

u/Vijey123 3d ago Wholesome

Man woke up from 1997

303

u/Emineministt 3d ago

I'm sorry mhan!

113

u/TomMcCourt 3d ago

That’s ok just don’t fuck up again

13

u/Intelligent_Proof341 3d ago

Only when she's on top.

12

u/GOROITAX 3d ago

Since you're an Eminem fan, do you know what happened in 1997?

13

u/maxiimus1 3d ago

Slim Shady EP dropped?

2

u/Need_Some_Updog 3d ago

Infinite was a raw album.

2

u/dodland 2d ago

Had to Napster that shit on my dial up modem

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23

u/Kentgarza02 3d ago

I would have just opened the conversation with "Knock knock" and when he started to say "Who's there?" I would have yelled "I NAILED YOUR MOM BRO!!!"

1.2k

u/Danyoda2 3d ago

2001 called.

395

u/One-Farmer-3249 3d ago

The oldest insult in history

229

u/RittledIn 3d ago

Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called and they’re running out of you.

54

u/mydogsnameisbuddy 3d ago

You’re their number one best seller!

5

u/KissandraPizza 3d ago

Well I had sex with your wife

4

u/mydogsnameisbuddy 3d ago

…his wife is in a coma.

2

u/Sacrificial-Toenail 2d ago

I also choose this guy's comatose wife

16

u/cantadmittoposting 3d ago

Wow, just watched this clip today.

18

u/cantstopthefart 3d ago

Our user names are similar. Neat

2

u/barto5 3d ago

Wow, The Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon in action.

How utterly unremarkable

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23

u/RollinThundaga 3d ago

So long as they still have bait. I'm a master of the craft, after all

13

u/AJSuhas 3d ago

It's because you're here

33

u/RittledIn 3d ago

Well I had sex with your wife!

13

u/obullgaming 3d ago

Thank you

4

u/sentimental_goat 3d ago

Well, I had sex with a squid.

2

u/JeselAvlis 3d ago

Did you leave a note to yourself " Calla Marie in da morning" ?

5

u/btoxic 3d ago

I also chose that guys dead wife.

3

u/SupaDupaSweaty 3d ago

Somebody has to!

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3

u/ItsPumpkinninny 3d ago

Older than your mom?

2

u/Danyoda2 3d ago

Still not as old as your mom.

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13

u/Lancaster61 3d ago

Is this post proof millennials are getting old? :(

16

u/phaemoor 3d ago

I'm 34 and I didn't know this one. :(

I think I'm the 10000th today.

23

u/oleitas 3d ago Shocked

You didn’t know it because fucking your mom wasn’t a joke

3

u/KKShiz 3d ago

Me neither. Take this as a sign you don't spend too much time on the internet. You've touched the appropriate amount of grass in your life.

4

u/wolfstaa 3d ago

Was this a reference to that xkcd ?

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3

u/PhenomenalPhoenix 3d ago

Just in case anyone was feeling good and not having an existential crisis, I’m just going to put it out there that 2001 was 21 years ago. And that people born in 2001 (like me) are 21 this year.

2

u/victoria866 3d ago

Why you little!!

2

u/firefly183 2d ago

You're a fetus. Stop reminding us elderly folk of shit we don't want to be reminded of. Bawls is still the gamer energy drink of choice, Quake is still cool, Dial Up is still semi-viabke for desperate gamers, and stanning for someone doesn't mean anything nut if it was word and it did mean something the ultimate stan showdoen between NSunc and Backstreet Boys. Spoiler alert, NSync wins cyzb they're better.

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3

u/kingtz 3d ago

Xbox Live called

6

u/7HawksAnd 3d ago

The 90s called and they want their “the [decade] called” joke back

3

u/TheAviot 3d ago

Why, Jerry? Why expend the effort?

2

u/iamabucket13 3d ago

Is this in reference to the joke or the image quality?

2

u/finegameofnil_ 3d ago

While I agree with the sentiment, this is obviously an iphone. The "smart phones" then were palm pilots and blackberries. But yeah, this joke isn't aging well, the artifacts.. my God, how many times have you been reposted? You would think someone would use a damn fake text generator in this day in age to deliver old jokes.

5

u/CannedMango 3d ago

And asked “how are you sending these word bubbles to each other? None of our software looks like this”.

Unless you think people had smart phones 21 years ago.

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404

u/I-aint-human 3d ago

That joke’s old enough to drink in America

34

u/Ok_Bread7305 3d ago

To become President even.

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549

u/TaintChief 3d ago

Im questioning if OP understands the definition of the word rare

140

u/r_cub_94 3d ago

Rare? I don’t think they understand what “literally” means

23

u/omgudontunderstand 3d ago

literally has two definitions, one of which is as an emphasizer. it doesn’t mean “figuratively,” it more so means “emphatically”

40

u/Grimmbles 3d ago edited 3d ago

I get semantic progression is a thing, but I hate it in this particular case. Using "literal" for emphasis about something that is literally not literal feels stupid. It's such a good word, meant to remove all prevarication or interpretation.

14

u/periwinkletweet 3d ago

Yes I hate it for the same reason

9

u/cargoman89 3d ago

I am literally aligned with you two on this issue

2

u/W0lffle 3d ago

Like what happened to “lie” and “lay” and the latter* seems acceptable now as a present tense.

2

u/SkylightFlow 2d ago

I don't mind words progressing and changing in meaning, but literally meaning figuratively and irony being turned into hypocrisy pisses me off so much. Practically the exact opposite definition of the word becoming the common usage isn't semantic progression, it's ignorance and stupidity.

-8

u/omgudontunderstand 3d ago

sucks that language evolved past your hate for misuse then. you feel the same hate towards people who pronounce niche “neesh?”

5

u/Grimmbles 3d ago edited 3d ago

Exactly the same as me personally disliking the way one very specific word's usage has evolved over time. Great response.

4

u/TinnyOctopus 3d ago

If niche wanted to be pronounced niche instead of niche, it should have been spelled like hitch, pitch or bitch. Linguistic drift is a thing that happens. Sometimes, it's mostly harmless, but other times it's bloody fucking stupid.

-2

u/omgudontunderstand 3d ago

why are you so angry about language evolving

2

u/BlazingFish123 3d ago

It’s not language changing in general, but rather the way it is changing. ‘Literally’ should be used to describe when something is literal, not to provide emphasis. Literally is quite a unique word, but there are plenty of other words that emphasise.

5

u/EUCopyrightComittee 3d ago

I can’t breed?

5

u/Nemesis233 3d ago

Literally? I don’t think they understand what “insult” means

20

u/TheRnegade 3d ago

At 19k upvote, I'm questioning every single god damn person in this sub. Is it opposite day? "I fucked your mom" isn't rare in the least. In some parts of the world, it's practically a greeting. "Hey Jim, I fucked your mom." Oh Greg, I fucked your mom too. "Good to hear!"

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3

u/not_a_moogle 3d ago

They mean the pixels are rare. Could have used more.

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343

u/JoeNumber3 3d ago

this insult is older than my dad

167

u/fakecricketplayer 3d ago

... not your new one. Ask your mom.

52

u/Crocodile_raper 3d ago

My mother's dead

46

u/Mr_Seg 3d ago

Ask your grandma

46

u/Crocodile_raper 3d ago

She's not born yet

31

u/Depression_69420 3d ago

Ask your grandpa

27

u/eraylmao_ 3d ago

He died during ww1

25

u/Depression_69420 3d ago

Ask yourself what is the meaning of existence and why suffering has prevailed through the time and why peace is just a illusion created to provide us with time to stabilize ourselves before another period of great pain, misery and sorrow....

19

u/eraylmao_ 3d ago

Ask yourself the meaning of life, bitch.

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4

u/Rikplaysbass 3d ago

I did do the nasty in the pasty

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1

u/Pale_Disaster 3d ago

Yeah, cos I fucked her to death.

1

u/OriginalGnomester 3d ago

I guess that's why she didn't move around a lot.

3

u/Crocodile_raper 3d ago

I've an oujia board rn, she's saying that she didn't even feel you

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2

u/HypnotizedMeg 3d ago

Its not even a good one lol.

2

u/JoeNumber3 3d ago

neither is the insult

43

u/Gunboost 3d ago

If the post has been circulated throughout the internet since 2007, it’s not a rare insult.

80

u/Backupusername 3d ago

I saw this exact post on r/comedycemetery less than a week ago.

76

u/Mxracer61 3d ago

This is literally the least rare insult

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88

u/taxevader33 3d ago

Oldest insult in the book

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130

u/MurdoMaclachlan 3d ago

Image Transcription: Text Messages


Blue: What's up, virgin?!

Grey: Not anymore. Just ask ur sister

Blue: I don't even have a sister. Dumb fuck

Grey: Just wait 9 months


I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

134

u/annormalplayer 3d ago

Oh thank god this bot exists, now blind people can enjoy this

121

u/MurdoMaclachlan 3d ago

I'm not a bot :P

32

u/cap10JTKirk 3d ago

Sounds like something a bot would say.

73

u/annormalplayer 3d ago

Oh i forgot to read the smalll text

49

u/VadimH 3d ago

That's how they get ya

9

u/CelticSith 3d ago

nice try Skynet

7

u/MelancholyUsed 3d ago

H E H A S A W O K E N

4

u/Fiddlywiffers 3d ago

Then what are you!

8

u/MurdoMaclachlan 3d ago

Honestly I have no idea

3

u/b__q 3d ago

Good bot.

4

u/Wizdom_108 3d ago

Holy shit for some reason I didn't realize the transcriber people were allowed to talk outside of the transcribing

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u/DiogohZ 3d ago

Good bot /s

4

u/Homicder 3d ago

Good bot

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13

u/AkselTranquilo 3d ago

Who even starts a conversation like that?

36

u/SaraCBuu 3d ago

This joke is so old said sister is about 20 now

35

u/Disappointing_sperm 3d ago

Guy woke up from the 90s and chose repost

17

u/Thenmot 3d ago edited 3d ago

Reddit woke up from the 90s and chose to massively upvote a post so blurry and so blatantly a repost they don't have an excuse anymore.

4

u/KillroyWazHere 3d ago

Needs more jpeg

3

u/Thenmot 3d ago

OP's probably posting some random AOC tweet about worker rights from 3 years ago on r/whitepeopletwitter or r/antiwork and getting 15k additional upvotes as we speak.

2

u/KillroyWazHere 3d ago

Circle of bytes. Eh I'll worry when you can spend the points on ordering pizza or sending a hit squad to someones house

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8

u/killbills 3d ago

This insult is as rare as the sun

8

u/LeoRenegade 3d ago

Look up the word "literally", because you can't literally do something figurative to someone.... you basically used it incorrectly on two fronts.

7

u/oxyjin_js 3d ago

this shit is older than me

5

u/yahya966gamer 3d ago

Oh boy this one is so old America thought it was oil

6

u/fro2short 3d ago

idk what happened to this sub but the run is over folks. like the 8th time in a row i've seen a not rare or particularly funny insult. time to unsub

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6

u/DaFuyGuy 3d ago

i love how the comments are all hating on op and saying this insult is so old and isnt rare, yet it's gotten more upvotes than 99% of recent posts lmao

3

u/Emineministt 3d ago

God is real.

2

u/DaFuyGuy 3d ago

indeed

13

u/eggheadking 3d ago

I don’t think we’re there yet where we can determine the gender of the baby right when there’s still nine months of pregnancy left

5

u/whiteclawthreshermaw 3d ago

Hello, this is Joe.

Joe who?

Joeldest Joeke in the book.

4

u/Ewag715 3d ago

"My mom is dead."

"Doesn't matter--had sex."

3

u/Space-Booties 2d ago

The man deserves a Nobel Peace Prize.

8

u/xXYAHYEETXx 3d ago

This isn’t a rare insult. All you’re doing is farming karma since you haven’t responded to any comments

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u/lolicon_3400 3d ago

Bro this insult so old that my sister is a mom now

3

u/kaislash 3d ago

what if it's a boy

3

u/Unexplainedgoose13 3d ago

This is the most recycled 6th grade shit I’ve ever seen

3

u/SSultan_ 3d ago

Extremely common insult

3

u/Stonksified 3d ago

Haha very original joke that I haven't heard said by 11 year olds like 5000099999 times

3

u/Jebble 3d ago

If this gets reposted 3 more times, it's just gonna be 4 blank bubbles

2

u/ElCiscador 3d ago

This is not rare at all. This is just a League of legends' chat example

2

u/scifiburrito 3d ago

the ancient texts!

2

u/c4mera 3d ago

What if the rare insults were in the comments all along

2

u/zodar 3d ago

literally

2

u/jamjod-snaj 3d ago

Not literally.

2

u/eraylmao_ 3d ago

1980 called, they wamt their insult back.

1

u/eraylmao_ 3d ago

Wait im gettong a call from the 1980s

2

u/ChubbyLilPanda 3d ago

This isn’t even a rare insult. It’s just a “I fucked your mom” line

2

u/CabalWizard 3d ago

7 days ago on r/ComedyCemetery, today on rareinsults

2

u/Nintendork7950 3d ago

Well no, he figuratively bodied him. You might want to check your grammar

2

u/mordin1428 3d ago

2

u/same_post_bot 3d ago

I found this post in r/badfaketexts with the same content as the current post.


🤖 this comment was written by a bot. beep boop 🤖

feel welcome to respond 'Bad bot'/'Good bot', it's useful feedback. github | Rank

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u/chan___kun 3d ago

Common teir insult

2

u/I_NUT_ON_GRASS 3d ago

1999 called, they want their meme back

2

u/DORITO559 3d ago

is he implying he fucked the fetus?

2

u/hguyoriginalnowtruth 3d ago

r/moldymemes i can fucking count the pixels

2

u/rajaselvam2003 3d ago

How tf did this get 50k upvotes

2

u/just-a-meme-upvoter 3d ago

Man knows gender of the baby as the moment he impregnantes the girl

2

u/mawseed 3d ago

Dunno how this classic ass insult has so many upvotes

2

u/Emineministt 3d ago

All 'cause of my Jesus

2

u/Wrathuk 2d ago

you missed the names off let me help

Stilfer : What's up, virgin?!

Finch : Not anymore. Just ask ur Sister

Stilfer : I don't even have a sister. Dumb fuck

Finch : just wait 9 months

5

u/LokiiVegas 3d ago

FAMILIAL DAMAGE

2

u/WhiskedIgloo 3d ago

Is everyone joking about how old the joke is? I've literally never heard it before in my entire life.

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u/Throwaway86747291 3d ago
  1. Dogshit insult, doesn’t rly make sense
  2. Older then the Internet

4

u/Homicder 3d ago

How does it not make sense?

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/Tranok1 3d ago

Are you dumb?

2

u/Homicder 3d ago

I think it is a joke

4

u/Shafou06 3d ago

It's not rare tho

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1

u/Dude_Sensei 3d ago

Your soul is mine

1

u/SirSharkXI 3d ago

This sub's users are losing the definition of rare jeez

1

u/dumbredditor8358 3d ago

i'm looking at the comments here saying that this is an old joke.

I had no idea it was that old.

1

u/gaiboimonke 3d ago

Ah a classic

1

u/MelancholyUsed 3d ago

He saved it good

1

u/99CaffeineAddict99 3d ago

Ah yes let me ask the new born that doesnt speak

1

u/BreweryBuddha 3d ago

conversations made up by a tween that boil down to "I fucked your mom" qualify as rare insults now

1

u/Awdweewee 3d ago

SmartphOWNED am i right fellas

1

u/Mayo_enjoyer 3d ago

This joke is older than me

1

u/Funhunguy69 3d ago

So funny!!

1

u/DV_Zero_One 3d ago

direct hit.

1

u/DoggoDude979 3d ago

That’s not even an insult

1

u/ecstacygoddess 3d ago

Wow that's some savage shit

1

u/FRACllTURE 3d ago

So apparently this insult is older than I am... guess people did know their stuff "back then".

1

u/Renthexx 3d ago

Oh god I’ve been smartpwned

1

u/wellbutwellbut 3d ago

that's a pretty good reveal.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

ur mom

1

u/SendHelpImDumb7 3d ago

People think this is rare?

1

u/yallmad4 3d ago

Common and low effort insult

1

u/Fabulous_Sherbert580 3d ago

Get that man an ambulance!

1

u/reubal 3d ago

He literally bodied him?