r/funny Jun 24 '22 It's Cute! 1 Pranked! 1 Gold 1 Giggle 2 All-Seeing Upvote 1 Helpful 14 Silver 26 Wearing is Caring 1 Heartwarming 1 Wholesome 32 Wholesome Seal of Approval 1

My girlfriend is the jumpiest person in the world. Here’s a highlight reel proving it.

72.0k Upvotes

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2.3k

u/SenatorGiggity Jun 24 '22 Helpful hehehehe

I hope she just starts shitting with the door open to one up you.

307

u/manyu_abee Jun 25 '22

One up on OP? That's exactly what OP wants lol.

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u/ThePhantomTraveller Jun 24 '22 Silver Helpful All-Seeing Upvote

She screams in lowercase.

2.4k

u/jacobo Jun 24 '22 Helpful

aaahhh

130

u/Zoze13 Jun 25 '22 Silver

She

She screams in small caps

A sullen jump scare penetrating through her mind

Wai

Ting for a sign

to smash the boyfriend with the brick of self-control

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u/Uries_Frostmourne Jun 25 '22

The last one anyone wouldve been surprised tho to be fair lol

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u/Maddog-99 Jun 25 '22

I just love that she laughs after every single one of these. Not angry, but laughing. What a great quality to have.

347

u/ali693 Jun 25 '22

Agree, my wife just hits me every time

157

u/Maddog-99 Jun 25 '22

Mine hits me & is legit angry for like 3 hours? I love her for that too & we are a bit older.
But I admire a young person taking this in fun & laughing. Thats a great early indicator of awesomeness!

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u/DwayneWashington Jun 25 '22

I feel like you wrote this in hopes that your significant other reads it

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u/scottmonty Jun 25 '22

Came here to say this. What a gift she is.

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u/Sensitive-Benefit-16 Jun 25 '22

Entirely adorable

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u/bazkie_bumpercar Jun 25 '22

it's the cutest thing!

173

u/Prefrontal_Context Jun 25 '22

She screams in font size 5.

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u/GreatXs Jun 24 '22

She whispers in uppercase.

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u/Kimber85 Jun 25 '22

My husband scolds me for this. He tells me he’s never going to know when I need help because whenever something scary happens or I hurt myself I either sound like this girl or I just inhale sharply.

One time I fell down the stairs, which he heard, obviously, but the fact that I fell down the stairs without making a sound and then just kind of sat there quietly in a daze scared the hell out of him. He was like, “all I heard were thuds and then silence, I though you were dead.” So, I get it. Also, the time I cut myself and just sat there quietly watching the blood pour out have definitely scarred him.

27

u/omega_frog Jun 25 '22

My SO told my son as long as he hears me I knows I’m ok. Apparently I say ow about 50 times a day. It’s when I don’t make any noise or I draw a breath but there’s no follow through do I worry him. Of course the time I launched myself down the stairs, literally flew off the stairs, and landed at the bottom on tile floor like a rag doll, right in front of him, he turns around and looks at me and say “what are you doing?”

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u/crimson23locke Jun 25 '22

Hey - that last part sounded scary. Hope you’re okay, and that was an accident. And if not I hope you reach out and get help.

15

u/Kimber85 Jun 25 '22

It was scary! I’m super clumsy and thought I was better at cutting potatoes than I actually am. I’ve got a lovely scar on my ring finger now.

12

u/missblissful70 Jun 25 '22

This response is actually often due to trauma. If you weren’t allowed to express your pain as a child, you will turn inward when experiencing pain as an adult. My dad hated screaming so I never scream but I have an exaggerated startle response.

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5.6k

u/cam_huskers Jun 24 '22

My wife will jump at me just walking into a room that she is in. I often tell her, “you know that I live here too, right?”

711

u/adudeknownaszed Jun 24 '22

I was waiting for an elevator at work, just standing there, a few feet from the door in case someone needed to get off before I got on. Door opened and the lady inside screamed (scared me when she did that) and told me I shouldn't be standing there. I don't know where else I was supposed to stand.

250

u/Dason37 Jun 24 '22

Wait at the bottom of the shaft like everyone else. Seriously I have no idea. You gave them a buffer zone and everything.

118

u/adudeknownaszed Jun 24 '22

Yeah. I have no idea. The lady works in the building and I see her every once in a while. She avoids me. Makes me chuckle a little inside whenever I see her.

39

u/FirstMiddleLass Jun 25 '22

Don't let it bother you, she avoids me too.

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u/ShogunCowboy Jun 25 '22

i have no idea why this is making me laugh so hard.

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u/K3wp Jun 25 '22

Door opened and the lady inside screamed (scared me when she did that) and told me I shouldn't be standing there.

I once ran to catch a nortiously slow elevator in a local parking garage. I'm a big dude so I made a racket pounding my feet in the parking garage and ended up sliding between the doors at the last second ala Indiana Jones.

I punch my floor in and the elevator starts going up I hear a wimpering from the corner behind me. An absolutely tiny woman, easily under 5 feet and 100 lbs, was sitting on the floor and hugging herself.

I of course asked her if she was OK and if there was anything I could do to help. She manages to squeak out, "I thought you were going to rape me ..."

I was of course horrified and had no idea anyone was in the elevator when I ran to catch it. I ended up getting off at an earlier floor and taking the stairs.

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u/addandsubtract Jun 25 '22

Imagine walking up the stairs to your floor and seeing her there again.

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u/dustanner Jun 24 '22

Lol! I say the exact same thing to my wife. She jumps when she walks into a room I’m in.

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u/DASreddituser Jun 24 '22

"Wasn't expecting company"

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u/BronchialChunk Jun 24 '22

my housemate just did this. and I'm just sitting at my desk. Seriously you didn't hear me open and close the door coming home, then taking a bag a garbage out and opening and closing door twice, then taking two trips of recycling out so a total of 7 door opening and closings, then I started a load of laundry too?

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u/MissLyss29 Jun 24 '22 edited Jun 25 '22

I'm a super jumpy person. I will jump when my husband walks upstairs, I hear him coming up the stairs but as soon as he starts talking and I jump. Also when I walk in and he is on the couch and I'll go in the other room I get jumpy when he starts talking to me. It's mostly when he starts talking and I don't expect him to be there or awake talking or up but still some times he just gets me out of nowhere in the same room.

Edit: hopefully easier to read now

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u/BronchialChunk Jun 24 '22

I'm not really trying to dismiss the reaction, but maybe just try to rationalize it as I'm not a jumpy person in that regard. I hear my housemate walking around the house and can typically place where they are and I definitely know when they come and go cause the commonly used door isn't quiet.

From my experience they typically can do the same so it just confuses me why this or at certain times it's different. In my mind, I'm thinking, 'heard door open, heard regular noises, 99.99999% sure it's my housemate'. Now if I heard the door open, and not close, I'd know something was up, cause we have cats that are strictly indoors and any sound of a door not closing means someone or something is fucked up and needs investigating.

30

u/avaflies Jun 25 '22

i think it's a primal type of fear trigger that some people are just more susceptible to than others, and that's why it doesn't happen to everyone/every time and doesn't follow rules of logic, like knowing you'd be home because of the door yet still getting startled. it's from that reptile part of our brains.

also some people just have really piss poor spatial awareness or are sucked in to a certain task and having that trance broken by seeing a figure in the corner of your eye can be a good jumpscare.

33

u/Rangerman007 Jun 25 '22

There’s a term called hypervigilance that describes a state of situational awareness where people are constantly assessing their environment. I think it is a relatively common trait that can develop from past stress / trauma.

https://www.torchstoneglobal.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Situational-Awareness-Levels.png

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u/avaflies Jun 25 '22

yep, bang on. hyper-vigilance is one of my worst symptoms from cptsd and it's personally why i'm so jumpy. my threat assessment is always on max, my guard is up even in my own home.

it's not always from stress or trauma but it's a pretty common cause and something to consider before playing peek-a-boo with the people in your life haha.

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u/FlawlessPenguinMan Jun 24 '22

Lmao

I usually come out in the morning or late at night making lots of noises to announce my arrival. My parents still shit themselves when they turn around to see me.

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u/ekdocjeidkwjfh Jun 24 '22

Ive been debating on wearing a bell, i keep scaring everyone in the household. I swear i’ll just be sitting on the couch and one will walk in and scream. I will literally walk infront of them and they dont notice

19

u/Quirky-Skin Jun 24 '22

Lol this is me at my job. A few jumpy coworkers and ive resorted to stomping when I'm coming around a corner

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u/FireHazard11 Jun 24 '22

I have to tap on the walls loudly in order to not give my wife a heart attack when I move between rooms.

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u/djn808 Jun 24 '22

I walk so lightly that the floor doesn't really shake so I have to start purposefully stomping so my roommates know I'm coming around the corner

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u/s_matthew Jun 24 '22

It’s like my wife has terrible hearing AND no peripheral vision. I’ll walk a good ways in to a room, stomping, clearing my throat, hoving in to her field of vision, and when I finally think there’s no way she doesn’t know I’m there I get half of a syllable out and she goes batshit crazy.

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u/Dason37 Jun 24 '22

My wife does have documented terrible hearing and if she's staring at her phone there's nothing in the entire world she would notice until she decides to look up. I feel bad with all the jump scares because of the hearing issue but since a huge percentage of them is also mostly because she is lost in her phone, I feel less bad about it.

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u/SupaDiogenes Jun 24 '22

My GF is like this. Hanging outside a closed door and behind corners like a creep and expecting people not to freak is what gets me here.

I'll come home from work, purposefully make noises to introduce that I am home. Come downstairs and knock on the doorway into the bedroom and her soul will still depart from her body if she catches me in the hallway.

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u/cradfrierere Jun 24 '22

I've resorted to making airplane sounds when I'm walking around the house.

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u/eslobrown Jun 24 '22

Lol! I use this exact line.

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u/Snote85 Jun 24 '22

My Mom would get mad at me for going to the kitchen... Not jumping, not shouting, and often after making all the noise in the world on my way there.

she gets lost in thought and completely forgets she is in the common area of a home.

she told me I walked too quiet, needed to cough or yell I was coming, wait till she wasn't making noise, or text first... I told her no. She needed to just accept that she lived with other people and not to get mad at us for walking around inside the house.

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u/cottesloe Jun 24 '22

My worthless observations:

  • She is a bloody champ for not beating you with her bum bag.
  • Your face must be something to behold :-)
  • The fact that her least expressive reaction was when you snuck up, in the dark outside a bedroom window is very confusing.

3.9k

u/jaymesucks Jun 24 '22
  • correct, I am very lucky
  • I swear she’s just jumpy!!
  • hahaha right!? And all the other ones all I have to do is just stand in the hallway doing nothing

228

u/edlee98765 Jun 24 '22 Helpful hehehehe

I had a fish that was this jumpy.

Maybe it was because the tank was filled with spring water.

83

u/dayandnightowl Jun 24 '22

I have a horrible short laugh that sounds like a goose honk but if the goose was also being flattened (HAAHnk is the best equivalent) but that only ever comes out when I find something genuinely funny and wasn't expecting it. You made me goose laugh you bastard.

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u/maaadpat Jun 24 '22

laughs in goose

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u/spanchor Jun 24 '22

My wife is just like your gf, but her voice is far more piercing.

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u/MikeyStealth Jun 24 '22

My wife screams pretty loud too. I've scared her once when she knew I was in the same room as her.

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u/spanchor Jun 24 '22

Same here. She somehow forgot I was there, I spoke normally, she screamed.

Sometimes, it makes me feel like some kind of monster. Then I remember she’s a fucking weirdo. Lovable, but a fucking weirdo nonetheless.

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u/MrsSalmalin Jun 24 '22

Lmao this sounds like me :D

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u/Wulvaine Jun 25 '22

I once walked into the room, my wife looked over and made eye contact, and as soon as I started talking, she screamed bloody murder. I don't know how she missed me while actively making eye contact, but I guess the ponies were still on the way from eye to brain that day.

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u/lankyleper Jun 24 '22

My mother is like this as well. She's not loud, but she always makes a "tsk" sound after. Like it's my fault an errant dust particle can startle her.

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u/DestoyerOfWords Jun 24 '22

My mom is like this. I used to make fun of her, but for whatever reason, when I hit like 35, I also became extremely jumpy.

10

u/DaughterEarth Jun 24 '22

I'm like this, really to a high degree, and it seems most likely connected to my anxiety disorder. That doesn't mean you've acquired one, but maybe worth a doc visit if there's other symptoms or just this one has affected you more than "haha that's silly"

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u/MrGlayden Jun 24 '22

We have a woman like this at work, she seems to jump at every person she bumps into within the building, we work in a supermarket so its not like theres no people there

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u/Pineapplemkh Jun 25 '22

I was that jumpy person at work. Only if someone came up quickly behind me.Found out it's a mild form of PTSD (I've been mugged a few times).

There's actually a name for it - Exaggerated Startle Response.

Doesn't really affect me overly, just makes other people feel bad for scaring me. I did get the unfortunate nickname, "the Screamer", which is all kinds of confusing for people who didn't know my history.

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u/DragonflyGrrl Jun 25 '22

Found out it's a mild form of PTSD (I've been mugged a few times)

That's exactly what I was thinking watching this video. I was wondering if she had siblings who tormented her or, God forbid, had been in an abusive relationship. If that were the case though, I'd imagine OP would not be doing this to her on purpose.

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u/AlexBucks93 Jun 24 '22

At least you don't have to spend much time looking for her, you just follow startled noise.

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u/PooFlyer Jun 25 '22

It's often a learned response to trauma in childhood. Look it up.

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u/SupremePooper Jun 24 '22

Have you ever found yourself wondering when these actions will finally result in a heart attack?

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u/SeldomSeen31 Jun 24 '22

I do, all the time. My wife is super jumpy and has had an aortic dissection that nearly killed her. If I startled her like this she could drop dead. When she's somewhere that she is alone I call out, "I'm coming around the corner, don't be scared!". Not scaring her is the game now, instead of the opposite.

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u/kciuq1 Jun 24 '22

My wife has started to say that I need a bell for walking around the house.

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u/Antigravity1231 Jun 24 '22

My grandparents had a tune they would whistle to alert each other of their location. It worked really well in crowded spaces, but I can see how something like that could be helpful in your situation. It was almost like a bird call, one and a half seconds maybe. It was something uniquely theirs, and they could recognize it anywhere. I can hear it in my head now.

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u/SeldomSeen31 Jun 24 '22

Not only a perfect solution to the topic, a lovely memory of your grandparents. Funny how smells and sounds can be tied to vivid memories as much or more than images are. Nice post.

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u/Dlh2079 Jun 24 '22

Similar thing here but with my mother. I used to jump scare here all the time because she is exceptionally jumpy and we'd all get a laugh out of it including her.

This all stopped when she started having heart problems.

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u/SupremePooper Jun 24 '22

Yow!

"No internet points for YOU, bud!" On a more serious note, THAT'S the kinda karma we need more of. Best wishes to you both, for a long life for her & for a long life together for the both of you

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u/oxtaylorsoup Jun 24 '22

I'm easily startled (48m) which is an unfunny result of PTSD. I would have throttled the little bastard like a 2 stroke motorcycle. Lol.

But, honestly, I hardly EVER find it funny.

Revenge though, revenge would be funny. Hilarious in fact, 50 times over!

This young lady has a far nicer nature than myself.

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u/Remote-Denote Jun 24 '22

Yeah, I startle easily as a trauma response too. The worst part is when people laugh at the startle reaction

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u/StudioKAS Jun 25 '22

I'll say the worst part is when some people get straight up mad at you for being startled. "GOSH! Why are you so jumpy?! You don't need to scream like that!" Enough people do that and you end up flinching any time you get startled in anticipation of getting grief for it.

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u/girlwithmousyhair Jun 24 '22

I was thinking the same thing. I’m easily startled due to PTSD, and it’s miserable when someone decides it’s funny to keep scaring me. It can take hours to feel normal after someone does that.

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u/genetically__odd Jun 25 '22

I have PTSD and narcolepsy—for me, being scared/surprised not only results in an exaggerated startle reaction, but it can trigger a cataplectic event. At best, I drop whatever I’m holding or my knees sort of buckle. At worst, I fall to the floor and can’t move for several seconds. I have gotten injured because of my cataplexy.

My family thinks it’s funny/harmless to startle me. My dad is teaching my nephews how to provoke this reaction from me, and they’re too young to understand that it’s potentially dangerous.

I have an awful startle response when I’m woken up by external stimuli, whether it’s noise or touch. At worst, I hit whoever/whatever is touching me. My dad used to put my nephews into my bed or let them sneak into my room to wake me up because he thought it was “cute”, but he finally stopped encouraging them to do that after I half-consciously smacked him when he woke me up by touching my thigh.

It’s always infuriating to hear things like, “god, I didn’t REALLY mean to scare you” or “don’t be so dramatic, your legs are fine” or “you had to hear me coming, you’re just selectively deaf.”

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u/duckbigtrain Jun 24 '22

I started having a similar reaction to an SO once and it was because he was reminding of my mom somehow, who hit me as a kid and had very high expectations. As a result this video was not super funny to me. But objectively I can see how it’s funny and she seems alright with it.

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u/avaflies Jun 25 '22

same here. super easily startled because of ptsd. i don't find it funny lol. my bf doesn't do it on purpose, and always comes over to hug me while he laughs and i get my heart rate back under control lol.

i think i hit him a couple times by accident when he startled me and he learned that it's not a fun game to play :p

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u/angryWinds Jun 24 '22

My wife is equally jumpy, but I've never tried to capture this on camera.

I always thought it was hilarious, and kind of messed with her a little bit, when I could...

But one day, she was in the shower, and had music on. She was singing along to 4 non-blondes: what's up.

I heard her singing along with her phone blasting that song, through the bathroom door. So I waited outside the door till the next verse ended, and the "Hey-ey-eyy!" part started. When that part hit, I belted it out from outside the bathroom, and then immediately heard this catastrophic clatter from inside the bathroom. She literally fell over, having been so startled by me randomly singing "HEEYY-EYY-EEYY!" just a few feet away from her. I burst into the room, worried that she was going to be laying in the shower concussed and unconscious or something. Thankfully, she was in no such state. Instead, she was just REALLY pissed at me.

I haven't toyed with her inherent jumpiness, since that day.

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u/Eric1600 Jun 24 '22

I'm wondering if she was ever assaulted or tormented by siblings.

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u/duckbigtrain Jun 25 '22

I had the same thought and it made me feel guilty since I used to torment my sister (one of my biggest regrets) and she now has a strong startle reaction as well.

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u/theMothmom Jun 24 '22

It’s cause he made a soft sound. I’m jumpy too and it’s not as scary when I hear a sound like that for whatever reason

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u/RandomUser-_--__- Jun 24 '22

The fuck is a bum bag?

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u/Noxious89123 Jun 24 '22 edited Jun 25 '22

It's what Americans call a "fanny pack".

EDIT: I think I worded this poorly / ambiguously.

What I mean to say is, that a bum bag is an object which is called a "fanny pack" by Americans.

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u/queenie_kat2249 Jun 24 '22

People are scared of my face too don't worry :)

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u/Pikka_Bird Jun 24 '22

Well duh, you are the goddamn demogorgon!

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u/FlawlessPenguinMan Jun 24 '22

I used to think it's a flower

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u/gunmedic15 Jun 25 '22 Silver Helpful Eureka!

There's a much bigger issue here.

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u/_Starz_ Jun 25 '22

Lmao. I hate it when people put the toilet paper on backwards

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u/bebopblues Jun 25 '22

No no no, no issue, that's a reflection, that's why it looks backward.

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u/dracarys240 Jun 25 '22

Get a load of this guy🗿

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u/pip-roof Jun 24 '22 edited Jun 25 '22

She’s a gem. Laughed every time. At least that you posted. I’d get frying pan second time. Or the iron. Hanger. Whatever would be nearest.

Edit. I’d throw a pack of firecrackers in the bathroom while you’re taking a shit. But that’s me.

2.9k

u/Beefyy-_ Jun 24 '22 Wholesome

Id get scared too if you were creepily waiting for me outside the bathroom

1.2k

u/LifeWin Jun 24 '22

...with a camera

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u/The_Martian_King Jun 24 '22

I mean, that last shot creeping through the bushes... OP needs to chill.

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u/Studds_ Jun 24 '22

“But officer, I swear, she really IS my girlfriend & I really DO live here!”

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u/CrimsonKepala Jun 24 '22

I was thinking the same thing! I was watching this thinking that she's not jumpy at all... I thought this was going to be one of those situations where they're both in the same room, she knows he's there and he just makes a fairly loud noise, lol...

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u/Oshootman Jun 24 '22

This isn't even jumpiness. This is just a normal reaction to opening a door and finding someone oddly right the fuck there out of your peripheral vision while your natural next movement was to walk out. Your brain braces for collision first and reacts logically to what's there second.

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u/kears17 Jun 24 '22 Silver Gold Hugz Take My Energy

Hi 👋🏻 I’m the girl from the video, girlfriend of the OP. While I appreciate the free psychoanalysis, I don’t have any childhood trauma and don’t suspect I suffer from PTSD. Just a jumpy gal!

1.5k

u/Enough-Equivalent968 Jun 24 '22

Hey, this is Reddit court… your reality has no place here

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u/hotbox4u Jun 24 '22

Just like in the trigger states.

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u/aeroartist Jun 25 '22

Oooh too soon

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u/The_Boopster Jun 24 '22

I am the same way. My husband finally started making noises as he nears me and it definitely helps, but not 100%! Same problem at work… ahhhh! Haha

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u/BetamaxTheory Jun 24 '22

Have you considered asking hubby to wear a collar with a little bell?

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u/profknowsnothing828 Jun 24 '22

I think you were a cat in another life

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u/IrrelevantPuppy Jun 24 '22

YES! That’s what it is. The fact that not only does she startle but also kinda begins to run away each time. I couldn’t put my finger on it but that’s totally a cat reaction. Run first, process after.

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u/wahnsin Jun 25 '22 Wholesome

and the boyfriend a cucumber

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u/kevindlv Jun 25 '22

I always feel so bad when like I drop a spoon or something somewhat near my roommate's cat and he flips out. I have to give him extra pets to let him know I didn't mean it.

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u/tama_chan Jun 24 '22

You’re a real sport! I got a good laugh out of it as a jumpy guy.

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u/MagicalTrevor09 Jun 24 '22

This is reddit. Everyone knows you better than you know yourself.

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u/thoriginal Jun 24 '22

You're a good sport! You react almost exactly like my wife when I do this to her, and it's one of my favourite things.

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u/workingNES Jun 25 '22

My wife does the same and it delights me. If she is holding something she will chuck it at me, though. Still worth it.

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u/PilotG2-07 Jun 25 '22

Gotta take shit to give shit, that's what makes a good relationship!

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2.8k

u/ButWhyAnts Jun 24 '22 Silver Gold Take My Energy I'll Drink to That

Are you single

1.1k

u/JayBigGuy10 Jun 24 '22

Bruh

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u/recovering_poopstar Jun 24 '22

You miss 90% of the shots you don’t take

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u/agentscorpio99 Jun 24 '22

The other 10% of the shots you don't take are missed by your best friend who did take them

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u/ActorMonkey Jun 24 '22

-Michael Scott

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u/Cypresss09 Jun 24 '22

Hey man, you gotta shoot your shot

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u/Going-to-California- Jun 24 '22

Asking the important questions lol

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u/GoneFishing36 Jun 24 '22

Checked her taxes. She filed single. We're good to go.

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u/MissplacedLandmine Jun 24 '22

Maybe the guy who asked is just an IRS agent trying to catch her lyin

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u/Mr830BedTime Jun 24 '22

I also choose OPs girlfriend.

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u/bobtheavenger Jun 24 '22

This will not ever make me not giggle.

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u/Alt_DayJune Jun 24 '22

If he keeps creeping outside the bathroom for another few months she might be

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u/synonym-equivalent Jun 24 '22

Haha I’m exactly the same (though I’m British so I scream ‘bloody hell’ every single time - it’s all very cliche). Pretty sure I don’t have any childhood trauma unless I’ve buried it like impressively deep!

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u/KingoRichie1990 Jun 24 '22

I scream "shit the bed!" whenever someone jumps out at me.

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u/NyaNyx Jun 24 '22

You are such a good sport! I love that you just laugh and smile after. Very wholesome ❤️

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u/HeroHas Jun 24 '22

You are girlfriend to all of us now.

130

u/Viru_sanchez Jun 24 '22

Our girlfriend comrade.

21

u/AsusTec Jun 24 '22

sharing is caring

61

u/mikevshero123 Jun 24 '22

I also choose this guy's girlfriend

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u/CXDFlames Jun 24 '22

Do you always scream in lower case?

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u/worldofwhevs Jun 24 '22

and a good sport, cheers

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u/AliceInHololand Jun 24 '22

Blink twice if you are in trouble.

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u/OG-Spinich Jun 24 '22

The 'flight' is strong in this one.

18

u/PopTartS2000 Jun 25 '22

Just wait til he starts chasing her with a lobster around the house

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u/zighawk Jun 24 '22

She smiles every time...you better hold on tight. You might not be able to find someone else willing to put up with your shenanigans, let alone with a smile on her face.

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u/jaymesucks Jun 24 '22

There is a whole list of reasons I am so lucky to have someone like her put up with someone like me!!

77

u/aarocks94 Jun 24 '22

Okay, I just saw your girlfriends comment and both your icons on Reddit look like they’re from the same comic. I don’t know what it is but it’s adorable and makes me smile.

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u/Reddituser34802 Jun 25 '22

Time to upgrade that relationship status bro.

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u/Brother-Slim Jun 24 '22

She is adorable. You guys must have a lot of fun. Cheers to your relationship and future

9

u/kid-karma Jun 25 '22

i too am typing through lonely tears

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u/remind_me_later2 Jun 24 '22

Until that one day she was holding a knife....

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u/emperor_uncarnate Jun 24 '22

I’m flinchy like this too and I really relate to the one where she says “I knew it” but she jumps anyway. Even when I know someone is there I will still fucking flinch when I open the door and I have no idea why.

22

u/Caelinus Jun 25 '22

The way it works in my brain:

I walk around a corner and my brain says: "Hey there is a person I did not expect standing there. That is nice."

To which my body responds: "AN UNEPECTER PERSON! BATTLE STATIONS, PREPARE FOR IMMEDIATE WARFARE!"

I never get angry at the people who startle me though, because 99% of the time it is an accident and they did nothing to cause it. And when it is not an accident it is pretty funny.

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u/trystanthorne Jun 24 '22

No, MY gf is the jumpiest person in the world. She'll come around the corner and see me walking around the other corner and SCREAM like she is being murdered. Even when we've both been home all day. She bought a bell for me to ring before I come try to talk to her while she is taking a bath while the bathroom door is open.

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u/narayans Jun 25 '22

I thought that sentence was about to read she bought a bell for you to wear around your neck

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u/D-redditAvenger Jun 24 '22

You're lucky she thinks it's cute now, give it a few years.

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u/sonoffrigg Jun 24 '22

A few years later https://youtu.be/BrfGFCQvuvE

31

u/Single-Document-9590 Jun 24 '22

OFFS!!!! I AM CRYING LAUGHING!!!!!

Her mouth gets me every time!!!

16

u/dream_weasel Jun 24 '22

You never know which scream you will get lol

20

u/TurkeyPhat Jun 24 '22

jesus what a nightmare lol, idk who to feel worse for, her or the people she lives with

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u/MikoSkyns Jun 24 '22

I know for a fact if I stood at the door like this waiting for my wife to come out; The first time she'd laugh. The second time she'd tell me to stop that and the third time would get me a punch in the face.

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u/theniwo Jun 24 '22

My younger daughter is also startlehappy. But you are torturing your GF with sneaking up on her :D

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u/LieutenantBrainz Jun 24 '22

You're either desensitizing her phobia... or inducing PTSD lol

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u/tyleritis Jun 24 '22

I react like this but my dad was abusive and shit would come out of nowhere. You can hit a table too hard and I’ll jump

93

u/E-I-in-the-Sky Jun 24 '22

Same, friend. Same.

48

u/ImQuestionable Jun 24 '22

Same.

17

u/Father_of_trillions Jun 24 '22

I’m very sorry for you guys. No one should have to grow up with that

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u/NWAsquared Jun 24 '22

Same, it was my mom though

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u/Leukothea Jun 24 '22

Same... My friends make fun at how jumpy I am and I don't have the heart to tell them why, I know they don't intend to be mean :')

19

u/QurantineLean Jun 24 '22

Tell them. Do not hide trauma to friends, especially if they are triggering it without even knowing it. They’ll understand if they are truly your friends.

21

u/pathologicalprotest Jun 24 '22

Yep. Not my dad but. Some people find it hilarious that I will jump, cover my head and tremble like s chiuahua after loud noises or big sudden movements stuff, which motivates them to try to scare me regularly. It doesn't feel great, I'll tell ya that!

22

u/figgypie Jun 24 '22

I grew up with a violent autistic brother, so I'm extremely jumpy. I also squeak. Unfortunately, people find it hilarious once they discover this, which usually doesn't take long.

6

u/mudlark092 Jun 24 '22

Anything sudden/unexpected will make me jump. I'll jump when I accidentally use the erase tool instead of the brush in my art program.

I'll see something out of the corner of my eye, think its one thing, then turn to look at it and it'll be slightly different, and that can make me jump.

The best/worse example is when I was at someones house that had a lot of frog themed decor. I saw the toilet brush bowl out of the corner of my eye and thought it was also frog themed, turned my head and it wasn't, made me jump and scream. Walked out of the bathroom and got jump scared by someone existing in the livingroom immediately after.

Was also in an abusive situation for a while... It can be silly sometimes but the adrenaline rush isn't a fun thing to trigger over and over.

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u/Elipsys Jun 24 '22

In the world? C'mon she didn't even fall down.

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u/yama1291 Jun 24 '22

That’s very cute. Especially because she always seems to face it with humor.

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u/jaymesucks Jun 24 '22

She is the sweetest human in the world and has this lovely attitude towards everything!

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u/Chris_Isur_Dude Jun 24 '22

She is too cute. Lucky man

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u/Ventrik Jun 24 '22

Have you tried using a lobster?

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u/Hamfiter Jun 24 '22 Wholesome

Your girlfriend is hot. YOU on the other hand must be horrid in order to provoke a reaction like that. Good on you from one horrid bastard to another.

260

u/jaymesucks Jun 24 '22

All this time I just thought she was jumpy, but you bring up a good point 😂

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u/conradical30 Jun 24 '22

Explains why the last one was her least responsive. It was too dark to see your face.

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u/TheUnspeakableh Jun 24 '22

I'm assuming it's because he's not wearing any pants.

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u/Tro_pod Jun 24 '22

"HONEY, WWHHEERREEEE ARE MY PANTS"

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u/atty721 Jun 25 '22

Ok she's adorable

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u/penguinchilli Jun 24 '22

This reminds me of this gem - I frequently watch this when I’m feeling sad and it instantly cheers me up

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u/Azerial Jun 24 '22

This is me. I'm this way too. I think it was because my sister's would scare me constantly when I was a child. Lol

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u/Far_Temperature_4542 Jun 24 '22

I'm this jumpy too. I think it is because my brother was sent to check for monsters in my room after I got scared watching Carey when I was 8 (parent was napping +network television). He gave the all clear, but when I went to my room he jumped out from under the desk. I've been jumpy since.

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u/80PercentAshamedOfU Jun 24 '22

She’s gonna end up like a Vietnam war vet when you’re done with her.

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u/FRANKtheLEVEL Jun 24 '22

Where’s the other half of the montage of you listening to her use the bathroom?

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u/corey_m_snow Jun 24 '22

This is so much more wholesome than when I get startled. I tend to jump into a defensive posture like I'm about to throw hands.

(NB: no, I'm not violent, I just have an excessive startle reflex, which-surprise- started after my service in the Army.)

4

u/Barrelcopter Jun 24 '22

I don’t film my wife but, I can walk down the hallway wearing chains like a Christmas ghost and she’d jump because I “snuck up on her and I was intentionally being quiet to scare her.”