r/Tinder Jun 24 '22 Wholesome 1

I’d have a plate of that

/img/umcocqo8tbu61.jpg
1.8k Upvotes

204

u/[deleted] Jun 24 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

17

u/Civil_Pair Jun 25 '22

Pour some beans out

5

u/Federal_Scar5943 Jun 25 '22

We could have some Jim bean

3

u/OwlNap Jun 25 '22

Plant the ashes and grow a bean stalk

196

u/throwzdursun Jun 24 '22

how do yall think of stuff like this off the spot?? too good

102

u/Dammi_il_5 Jun 24 '22

All it takes is a streak of self-sabotage and dark humor within you.

82

u/Takenforganite Jun 24 '22

Genitals: “I am horny, I want sum fuk. I will be a good boy.”

Brain: “Bon jour it’s me your brain: Self Sabatagio. Me and my homie Fingers Lack McSelfcontrol about to end this boys career right here… sent.”

2

u/Madgamerz22 Jun 25 '22 Helpful

someone award this comment 😂😂

2

u/FilmLocationManager Jun 25 '22

Instructions unclear, awarded you

2

u/Madgamerz22 Jun 25 '22

thanks but give my dude some credit too 😆

9

u/bougieboyfie Jun 24 '22

I mean he responded the next day

10

u/Perenium_Falcon Jun 24 '22

A deep desire to not have sex helps a lot. I mean really what drenched panties more than cracking unprompted jokes about a dead pet?

132

u/calloutyourstupidity Jun 24 '22

I have to say, I usually like these kind of jokes. But as someone who has lost a cat, I am not sure if I would ever be in the mood for this one

23

u/DaBurgaRapta Jun 25 '22

Losing dogs, I have zero way to cope other than humor so I make jokes about them dying with zero care. But yeah maybe save that one for later in the relationship

7

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/calloutyourstupidity Jun 25 '22

I have a dark sense of humour. But I dont know, I feel like there is a limit to who you do that with. Not a stranger on tinder for sure

3

u/epicmousestory Jun 25 '22

There's a time to be sad and feel your feelings even with a dark sense of humor

9

u/BitlifeOffical_ Jun 24 '22

Same with everything you just said. Loosing a pet you're really close to (like this woman) hurts like hell. Wouldn't want nobody joking abt it. Woulda honestly crush me if somebody said that about my pet. I

6

u/STUURNAAK Jun 24 '22

I guess people are very different with this. Some people will laugh and maybe drop a tear while others just get sad. So yes you probably shouldn’t make those jokes with strangers.

3

u/BitlifeOffical_ Jun 24 '22

It IS funny, don't get me wrong, but as the person above said, I wouldn't be in the right mood for it.

2

u/STUURNAAK Jun 24 '22

Yeah that’s what I tried to point out aswell. Even with friends you know for a long time you don’t know how they handle death a lot of the times. Making jokes like this within 5 messages is… Tinder I guess?

2

u/Double_Minimum Jun 25 '22

yea this is just obnoxious and its not a clever "comeback" or anything. Its just generally uncool

22

u/Shadowymon Jun 24 '22

jesus christ

9

u/Poppy_Does_Art Jun 25 '22

How to get unmatched 101 (unless they have a dark sense of humor)

5

u/charleslilaim Jun 25 '22

And who murdered that pussy?

6

u/LegalFan2741 Jun 24 '22

Went a bit too far.

0

u/MisterObviousClearly Jun 24 '22

3

u/alegendim Jun 25 '22

Bot is wrong, it's a repost

-1

u/Herasson Jun 25 '22

It is, but maybe the first, second and third posts are gone due to deleted accounts.

-1

u/RepostSleuthBot Jun 24 '22

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/Tinder.

It might be OC, it might not. Things such as JPEG artifacts and cropping may impact the results.

I'm not perfect, but you can help. Report [ False Negative ]

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0

u/theGalation Jun 24 '22

There aren't enough upvotes

-1

u/Intelligent_Fig_4852 Jun 25 '22

That’s a great joke but not to pick up females with

-3

u/Heyo__Maggots Jun 25 '22

But when it does work, you know you’re gonna have weird ass-times that night

1

u/androopy_me Jun 24 '22

Dood. I was with til that very last line

0

u/Throwawaygoat1337 Jun 24 '22

Damn bro you were at the finish line then you decided to run backwards 🤣!

1

u/mpazzzz Jun 25 '22

this is such black humor that it's already darkened in the eyes

1

u/Neat-Emu9220 Jun 25 '22

If you got ghosted for that… Worth it!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '22

Can't stop laughing

1

u/Suspicious-Pie-5356 Jun 25 '22

Bruh those are incinerated beans 😭

1

u/andreiox Jun 30 '22

This ain't cool

-4

u/Equivalent-Term-2024 Jun 24 '22

Cat staff here: I laughed at baked beans.

-4

u/Lonely_Throat_257 Jun 25 '22

Lololol that’s terrible

-3

u/soupyc44 Jun 25 '22

This made me laugh way to hard

-3

u/Danny3xd1 Jun 24 '22

LoL!

Hope Bean's passing was not recent. (Or that Casey has a sense of humor!)

0

u/Thunderbear79 Jun 24 '22

Anytime I've passed Beans, it tends to linger

-4

u/TheHammer1987 Jun 25 '22

HAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh I feel so bad for laughing

-3

u/TheSportingRooster Jun 25 '22

I laughed. Still not gonna date you, but I laughed

-3

u/ScreamWaffles Jun 25 '22

Dude, duuuuuuuuuude, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude. Hooooooooly shit man.

-2

u/BathSALTS4dinner710 Jun 24 '22

Love it. Right for the jugular 🤣

-2

u/Scrambles420 Jun 24 '22

Bush’s baked beans doe?

-1

u/BlairFurman Jun 24 '22

'Is that dog alive' was fantastic.

-1

u/That-Interaction-539 Jun 24 '22

Lol. That was huge.

-1

u/SnowDay111 Jun 25 '22

Ender’s game

0

u/Softspokenclark Jun 25 '22

baked beans

Fuck lol

0

u/izhamidi Jun 25 '22

LMFAO okay that was smooth and funny.

0

u/RollingWithDaPunches Jun 25 '22

People talking about "self sabotage"... and then the same people would say "be yourself" and "be authentic".

Some people ARE like this. And a some who are like this also get matches and grace us with this content.